Father Finally Father's Day

Father's Day is a day that's meaning has changed to me throughout my lifetime. This year marks the third phase in the view of the holiday to me personally.

Growing up, and through adulthood, my dad has been much more than my father, but also one of my closest friends. His influence is deeply ingrained in the man that I have become; from personality to values, to interests, and beyond.

I always looked at Father's Day as an important day in my family, and for my dad. He did so much to always make sure that we had the income needed to survive as comfortably as possible. He had been an avid fisherman and hunter; he spent my younger years playing softball and hanging out with a ragtag group of friends, and riding dirt bikes. All of these things were given up early in my life to focus on supporting his family and devoting time to our interests; specifically my sporting interest.

When I decided the first sport I would play was baseball, he not only quickly signed me up but became my coach. Through all the sports I would play, he would always be there cheering and supporting. After the long days at work (at a job he really did not enjoy) he would come home to whisk me off to practices, games, meets, and tournaments.

He was also there for my brother's gymnastics, martial arts, and cross country races. Between us and my mom's poor health and her many surgeries and doctor's appointments, my dad did not have time for any interests of his own for many years.

My first taste of fatherhood came about four years ago, shortly after moving to Iowa. Erin's two kids were 14 and 12 at the time. I came into a situation where the kids were already well on their way to becoming the people they were going to be. A lot of their childhoods had already taken place, yet they were also a long way from being adults.

We were getting to know each other in a turbulent time, but all got along well (awkwardness aside) right from the beginning. While neither of them really consider me a 'father', I have tried to be a solid and positive person in their lives. I do consider them to be my kids also, and we are all a family. With their introduction into my life, I began to look at Father's Day from the perspective of the father.

Now that I am becoming the father of my own child for the first time, the day is shifting into another new phase. I have all the excitement and nervousness of a first time dad. I know that within about 2 months I am going to have a tiny life dependent on me for mere survival- in addition to love, support, and understanding.

I, along with my amazing wife, have created a new life. That fact alone has a way of filling one with awe and wonder. It is still hard to wrap my mind around the fact that it can be real. Today I celebrate my first Father's Day as a father-to-be, and ponder the fact that this time next year I will have a little girl, glowing face yet to be gazed upon for the first time. Today is another day in the emotional process, and the growing connection between me and my still forming daughter.

Father's Day has again been forever altered in my perception of it, and I look forward to each and every one there is to come. My dad, my step-children, and my daughter have given this "Greeting Card Created Holiday" a depth and meaning to me that I would have never expected.

~Father Finally